What Do I Do if I Hate My Body?

Most of us can say we have felt this way from time to time. Honestly many of us have always felt this way. Inundated with the covers of Seventeen magazine and Vogue depicting small framed women in crop tops, followed by TV shows like 90210 and Melrose Place, showing us to be thin is "in," and beauty ads with false messaging targeted to make us feel "less than" in order to buy their product...maybe it's Maybelline?

Fast forward about thirty years and the vehicle has changed, but the messaging is still the same. Facebook, Instagram, Tik Tok -you name it- are busy pumping out videos of attractive people dancing around in short shorts or thirst traps of bikini-clad influencers posing in front circle lights and artificial wind. Hoards of preteens and teens see these "ads" one after another, second after second, and this begins to shape what they value in physical presentation. The conversation has to change.

What do I do if I don't like the way I look?

Full. Stop.

1. Your body is made for experiencing life, not solely to be looked at. What you do and what you feel plays a bigger role, as you navigate life in your own personal vessel. So what if your hairline is weird, or your nail beds suck- it doesn't matter. What matters is being proud of the features you are proud of! Curvy, athletic, short, tall - it's all worth celebrating!

2. Comparison is the thief of joy. Read that again. We are all probably guilty of looking at other people thinking that since they have great -butt, abs, face, whatever- but the second you give into those automatic negative thoughts, you have spoiled your mood and potentially ruined your day. Catch yourself when you do it. Stomp it into the ground. It is unproductive.

3. No one is allowed to talk about your body. Period. Anyone making comments about your body needs to be told to stop. This starts young. We need to teach our kids that no one can comment on their bodies unless they give permission. Simply teaching them to say "you are not allowed to talk about my body," and then watch how you talk about your own appearance. Little eyes and ears are watching.

4. Lastly, be kind to yourself. You would never talk to a friend or relative the way you might talk to yourself. Practice playing up your best features: Eyes, arms, smile, whatever...be proud of your vessel. You only get one. And it's a really good one.

-j